The Rodent Conspiracy Continues...

Have you seen this reprobate, good-for-nothing, troublemaker…this, this…this SQUIRREL?

Okay, the story continues…

My biking friends, our safety is at risk! Like the Biking Brady that has started posting license plate numbers of vehicles that have little or no awareness (or respect )for bicycles sharing the road, I am starting a Rodent Registry. This Rodent Registry is an attempt to identify these vermin for what they are…NUTS! I’m certainly convinced that the culprit pictured in this blog is, in fact, the same rascal that at the midday on June 21, 2008, intentionally and deliberately fell…no leapt…onto my helmet (and subsequently positioning itself eye-to-eye with me) to cause malicious cardiovascular distress and emotional duress. (Disinclined Riding Partner, August 14, 2008)

Look closely at this adrenaline-junky, this malevolent, maloccluded, mangy, may-do-harm. Look deeply into his beady eyes and observe the chainring grease still staining his furry little-coat. Don’t be deceived…these varmints are ANIMALS…I tell you!

The Registry will use photographic identification of the offenders, rather than names or numbers. After all, who has time to even catch a license plate number when you are trying to recover from a near-miss collision with a motor vehicle—least of all dodging the acrobatic antics of an agile antagonist. Check out how Minnesota, Wisconsin, Oklahoma, Oregon, Illinois, Utah, Arizona, Florida, Connecticut, New Hampshire, Tennessee, South Carolina and Maine have legislated a three-foot passing clearance. Check out Joe Mizereck's "Three Feet Please" Campaign and view the videos here. How close is too close?

Unlike other registry systems, out-of-state offenders will be featured, just like Brady’s…no motor vehicle licensure, voter’s registration, or mail-forwarding address will compromise the integrity of this registry of reprobates.

Oh…and, don’t get me started on the deer, marmots and gophers…

No animals were harmed in the production of this blog. Unfortunately, they were likened to an unthinking fraction of the human population that is creating a dangerous condition for both cyclists and motorists--by not passing with a reasonable clearance.

Please Share-the-Road, Thank You!